SEUN'S FUN NUGGETS: TEN KINDS OF PEOPLE YOU MEET AT AUDITIONS!

Being a practicing actor, attending the proverbial myriad of auditions is what many would call Standard Procedure. Now the audition venue most of the time tends to be a kaleidoscope of activity, where different talented individuals converge. Okay scratch the "Talented" part, cos thats not always true. Anyways, the point here is that an audition is  a "gathering" of personalities, reputations and egos. Here you meet all kinds of God's conceptualizations of the human specie. So I decided to make a short compilation of 10 archetypal variations of people you bump into at auditions. Here we go, enjoy ant tell me if you agree or not. (leave a comment).

1. Those who know all the stars in the industry.

People like this tend not  to hold back on any juicy gossip,

they practically know the colour of Jim Iyke's underwear 

and how many slices of bread Omoni Oboli ate that morning.

Now, i'm not saying this is an impossibility, the thing that ticks 

me off is that they don't shut up about it. 

 2. Overzealous production assistants who act like they own the place.

If you have ever been to an audition in Nigeria, you would have met someone

who fits into this category. In most cases these are the guys how handle the 

lists and general co-ordination of the audition itself. Sometime these guys

could be so bleeping rude and caustic that you would think you were 

begging for the role you came to audition for. Half the time, they are at the 

bottom of the production hierarchy (in other words NA DEM BE BOY BOY FOR SET)

Don't get me wrong, this is no to disrespect the profession of Production assistance but

some of them just really vex me.

 Personally I have had my own fair share of telling such people off (trust me it was fun...hehehe). 

 3. Groupies...

This item does not need a lengthy explanation. All you need to do 

is observe the scenery until a "so called" star walks into the audition

spot. Chai....Groupie patrol...instinctively flocks in their direction.

  4. Those who know all the directors in the industry...and talk very loudly about it.

Awww...common....need I say more in this case?!!

 5. The self proclaimed acting coaches ...sometimes they can't even act and then they are teaching you?? AH men!!

If a script is circulated and you need to pair up with a partner, God help you if

you are un-equally yoked with someone in this category....heheh it might just cost

you the role (If you really have talent that is).

 6. People who jump the queue...now these ones na im they vex me pass.

The standard practice is that you are attended to on a first come first serve basis. However some

people still want to skip procedure and jump the queue. I just have these few 

words;' have some self respect naaa c'mon'

7. The older actors, who think you should just give them your seat simply because they are older.

It's not like I have no respect for my elders, but I you came late for the audition

and don't have a place to sit, I should give up mine of my own volition 

and not as a result of your emotional blackmail.

8. Those who are over dressed ...sometimes it looks like its a party at those places. CHAI!

The ladies are mostly guilty here...I mean yes it is an audition and you 

should look good, but there should be a balance, draw the

line between what is fabulous and what is just too much.

9. The people who ask too many dumb questions....c'mon men ask the guys who work here...im an actor like you!

I'm not averse to being of help and answering a few routine questions

but asking me about things that only the producer of the movie would know, 

now thats just annoying.

10.Finally, those girls that overdo the make-up...watch who U hug men...they will soil ur shirt with foundation.

Yes ladies, there is nothing wrong with getting all dolled up, but apply that make-up

with moderation. Remember, sometimes less is more and it always helps to ask

a friend.